I typed a long, in depth, post for my semi annual update and xanga did something stupid and apparently lost it.  I'll try to piece it back together but it will never be as good as it was the first time.  I HATE that!

I've been at my job with the State since November.  Overall, it is going quite well.  netI was told by my supervisor just the other day that she told the chief that I was "the best employee they ever hired".  I have to wonder what kind of losers they have hired overall, if I'm considered the best.  I come to work, I'm generally on time, I do my work well with little supervision, I surf the net, help out when needed...  I will say that I like being told that I'm appreciated regularly whereas back at Giant I was used and abused and only told that I was appreciated when I said I was leaving.  It's a nice change of pace.  I won't let it go to my head.

Life with Adam is fabulous. Our time together, just the two of us, is everything I always expected it to be.  Yes there is drama with the ex wife (boy, is there drama!) and yes there is kid drama but we work through it.  Since the beginning of the year we've been increasing our kid time and we are now at 7 days out of every 14 - a big difference from the 3 out of 14 it was up until January!  There have been growing pains along the way, getting used to the new schedule but I think overall we, and the kids, are working it out very well.  Things with the kids haven't always been comfortable and the tension was understandable.  I think everyone can agree things may have been easier if I could have spent more time with them before I moved in, but that wasn't to be.  Things are what they are. 

I'm sure the kids don't like that their dad has a new woman in his life and they secretly (or not so secretly) wish that their parents would get back together, but I think I have a positive impact on their relationship with their dad and on them.  I'm a girl.  Three out of four kids are teenage girls. I understand girl things and see things in a way Adam can't.  I can put things into perspective for him and help him deal with them more rationally and calmly. 

I can also give another female perspective about things like tampons.  I can pass on the joys of tampons when their mother won't. I can not imagine life without tampons.  It would be quite sad if you ask me.  And when your daughter is regularly having accidents and has to wash out her panties every day, I think it's your obligation as a mother to present all the options to your daughter.  Oh but wait, you think tampons suck and do not see any reason to present this "uncomfortable" option to her, regardless of the fact that she may greatly benefit from this information.  I find that so close minded.  It's ok to find them uncomfortable and  not use them yourself, but it's not ok to not let your daughter make that decision for herself.  (And yes, Adam brought up the issue in co-parenting therapy with the ex because he didn't think feminine hygeine was a conversation that he should hold with his daughters, and ex actually said that tampons are uncomfortable and she would not educate the girls on them!)  At that point I knew it was up to me.  I had already been trying to have the tampon talk with the oldest, woman to woman, "no, I'm not your mom but I'm a chick too" because I realized there was an issue and seriously, she was doing exactly what I always did as a teenager too... but I admit I could never find the time or the words that were comfortable for me.  Regardless, I bought the tampons and put them under the sink with the other products.  Lo and behold they were found, and used!  I'm not sure that she had a tampon epiphany and her life has been greatly altered but the information was presented and experimented with and the child can make her own decision regarding what is most comfortable for her.

I think at the end of the day I realize that I may never have hugs and "I love yous" or even a "thanks for being here" but I know that they like me, even if they can't express that without it seeming to be a betrayal of their mother.  I know that I am a positive influence on them, and I'm a positive influence on their relationship with their dad.

Drama may flare up, I may miss my family back home, but at the end of the day when I kiss Adam goodnight, I am happy.  I don't want to be anywhere else.

I passed a state exam a few months ago to be an "Office Technician".  My job is as an office technician in the Milk and Dairy Food Safety Board, part of the California Department of Food and Agriculture.

It seems I'll deal with export licenses.  Apparently every ship/plane/whatever with California dairy products heading to another country needs a license.  The company can't have an ongoing license even if they ship stuff every day...  thusly they need a new license for every day.

Overall, the job doesn't sound fun.  But it's a job.  It will be nice to have money again tho I'm already mentally spending my first paycheck, and will literally spend it this weekend, before I've even started work.